My experience with Post Natal Depression

by Sandra Dillon, See Change Ambassador

I suppose the idea of a new born coming into my life was a big factor in my psychological problems because I had imagined a time of joy and excitement. But all I did was cry for hours and had difficulty sleeping due to fear. The anxiety came within the first few days and it continued throughout the next few months. As time passed, I developed mood swings and lost interest in life.

However, for me, the worst part was the negative thoughts and feelings. The self-sigma I was experiencing was over whelming. The voice in my head would tell me that I was not a “good enough” mother.

All of the images on the TV and baby clothes and tiny feet all added to the feelings of inadequacy. And then on a visit to the doctor, I had that same feeling reiterated when a doctor told me that I should seek help from my mother. He informed me that having a baby was the most natural thing in the world and the happiest time for a mother.

Yet I was struggling to cope. And the sad part was my parents and extended family and friends just didn’t understand me. I remember a family member saying that I had changed and was not the same person? My mental health moods were causing them distress, yet they never enquired HOW I WAS DOING? The “happiest” time for a Mum turned into an nightmare for me.

The support system didn’t exist, and I ended up having a breakdown before my condition was diagnosed. And then my recovery started because my issues had a name – it was Post Natal Depression.

Once I received the right support and treatment, I felt the love and joy for my little one return. It was a long lonely journey I travelled alone, but thankfully my daughter won’t have to because there are organisations like See Change pushing change in stigma reduction and highlighting the need for more education and understanding.


If you are having a tough time at the moment and need to reach out for support, please contact any of the following

Shine: phil@shine.ie

Samaritans: 116123

Pieta House: 1800 247 247

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